TWO SIDES OF MOTHERHOOD

You may be wondering… are there really two sides of motherhood? For me, there are.

There’s the side where you are a single mom, carrying everything on your own, and then there’s the side where you have someone who shows up, who supports, loves, and walks alongside you—not just in words, but in actions.

Being a single mom is hard. It’s heavy. It’s lonely. For years, that was my reality. I called the shots, worked long hours, paid every bill, managed every expense, and made every decision—big or small—alone.

I was strong, I was capable, but I was also exhausted, constantly weighed down by responsibility. I had learned to rely on myself because I had no choice, and over time, that independence became both my armor and my cage.

For a while, it felt good to be in control. After all the trauma I had endured, the bruises, the emotional scars, I had learned that depending on no one was safe. But it was also lonely.

I had never experienced a relationship where communication was easy, where decisions were shared, where love and partnership felt effortless and real. I didn’t know what it meant to lean on someone without fear, or to let someone truly help me.

And then, life changed. I found someone who loved, respected, and supported me. At first, it was strange to share the weight, to let go of the instinct to do everything myself.

I had to learn to trust, to communicate, to allow myself to rely on him. It wasn’t easy—old fears, old habits, old scars all whispered that I couldn’t let someone in, that I had to protect myself. But slowly, gently, it started to feel natural.

Being a mom with a partner doesn’t mean life is easier—far from it. There are still challenges, still responsibilities, still moments where I question myself or feel unsure.

But it means that the weight is shared. It means that someone sees me, hears me, and cares enough to act, not just speak. It means my children see a model of love and respect in action. And it means I don’t have to be everything alone, all the time.

Motherhood in both forms has shaped me. The single mom version taught me resilience, strength, and independence.

The partnered mom version taught me trust, vulnerability, and the beauty of shared life.

I have lived both, and I carry the lessons from each. I have carried myself through struggle and sorrow, and now I carry love alongside me too.

I’ve learned that motherhood is never simple, and it is never the same for anyone.

But having love alongside you, having someone who shows up, who listens, who acts with care, makes even the hardest days a little lighter—and the moments of joy brighter than I ever imagined possible.

Because this journey—through struggle, healing, and love—is mine. And I am stronger, wiser, and more capable than I ever thought I could be.

A Note from Mommy In Bloom 

This is the final entry in my Letters To Myself series, the closing chapter of my past.

I wrote these letters to honor my journey—the pain, the bruises, the mistakes, the lessons, and the healing.

To acknowledge the times I was lost, the times I felt invisible, and the moments I struggled to find my voice.

Two Sides of Motherhood is more than a reflection on parenting—it’s a reflection on life, on growth, and on learning to trust myself again.

It’s about standing tall after years of carrying the weight alone, and about embracing love, partnership, and support when it finally arrives.

To anyone reading this who has felt unseen, unheard, or unloved: you are not alone. Your pain is valid.

Your journey matters. And one day, when you are ready, healing can bring you not just peace—but a love that matches the strength you’ve carried all along.

This series ends here, but my story continues—and so does yours.

With love,

Mommy in Bloom